28 December 2016

2016 I’m Ready To Let You Go

Assalamualaikum wbt

 
I’m ready.

I’m ready to let you go. I’m ready to say goodbye to my favorite parts of you, the special memories, the moments I wish I could rewind. I’m ready to let them go, I’m ready to loosen my grip and welcome new ones. I’m ready to let the moments I loved slip through my fingers and go make new ones.

I learned.

I learned the lessons you were trying to teach me. I learned from the pain, from the heartbreak, from the betrayal, from the tears, from the mistakes and from my own shortcomings. I learned the hard ones; you were hard on me sometimes but I’m thankful for the lessons because I hope I’m a little bit wiser, a little bit stronger and a lot more resilient because of them.

I forgive you.

I forgive you for putting me through hard times, I forgive you for not making the good times last longer, I forgive you for being stubborn, for not turning things exactly the way I want them to and I mostly forgive you for all the lonely nights. In a way, they made me fearless, in a way, they taught me how to enjoy my own company and in a way, they made me unafraid of loneliness.

I love you.

I love you for all the blessings you gave me, for the times I spent smiling, for the all the times I laughed with my friends and the times I stayed up talking to someone I love. I love you for the moments when you made me feel invincible and for the moments you made me feel alive and for the ones that will live me with me forever. I love you for being so memorable, so unforgettable and so breathtaking.

I’ll miss you.

It’s strange, because you weren’t perfect but you still had a special place in my heart. Something about you was pivotal, something about you was comforting, something about you felt safe, like coming home after a long time, like I’m finally on the right track, in the right direction. Unlike all other years, you left an impact, you felt right. 

2017 — I’m ready. 

I don’t know what to expect, I don’t know what you hold for me, I don’t know if you’ll be better or worse, but I know I’m ready for you. I know that I can handle the bad moments and embrace the great moments. I know that I’m open to learning and appreciating why things won’t turn out the way I wish they could. I’m ready because I’m letting go of the past and willing to start over with you. I’m ready to buy a new book with empty pages so we can write the story together. I’m ready for you to give me a wonderful story to write.

Take my hand and take your pen and let’s work together as a team, for the first time, I’m on your side and I’m willing to work with you.

2017, I haven’t met you yet but I’m already in love with you. 

πŸ’Œ Rania Naim

18 November 2016

Life Nowadays :)


Hello everyone

Tetiba feeling pula malam ney. Mahu melawat belog yang semakin kurang mendapat perhatian saya. Hahahaha. Tak disengajakan. Namun sekarang ney blog macam tidak kena pandang orang suda. Tapi saya masih setia dengan ney media sosial, biarpun hakikatnya tiada orang lawat pun. 

Well I have no story to share here but, yeah, I miss this blog. Hahaha. I share so many things here, walaupun banyak post sudah kena delete. Kalau di sini, saya boleh jadi sangat sentimental. I do not know why but it is the truth. Emosi sampai boleh nangis.

Every song playing at the playlist akan remind saya pasal certain event yang berlaku dalam hidup saya sepanjang 24 tahun ney. Btw genap sudah umur saya 24 tahun. Hahahaha. Cukup umur untuk kahwin sudah Orang cakap. Orang laaa yang cakap. Namun hakikatnya masih lagi perangai macam budak-budak. Tapi mature suda aaa. Hahaha. Matang la sangat. Malar merajuk. Malar swing mood. Tidak ketentuan hahaha. 

One more thing, genap juga sudah setahun hidup di Tawau ney. Walaupun malar pindah bilik. Mencari keselesaan hidup. But yeahh, I survived here. Tipulah kalau tidak pernah rasa kesunyian kan. Kadang-kadang rasa kesunyian yang melampau tue datang juga. Depend sama saya jua macam mana maw deal sama tue keadaan. Dengan rasa homesiknya lagi, stress kerja lagi, dtress dengan keadaan sekeliling lagi. Fuuuhhhhh! Betul2 menduga kesabaran iman. Kadang-kadang rasa tidak mahu pun keluar dari bilik, baring di katil sepanjang hari, Tidak mahu pun sentuh hp. Terpaksa pujuk diri sendiri, kasih yakin hati, ingat Allah, ingat family di Ranau. Sabar, sabar, sabar, dan terus bersabar. Itu jak mampu.

Pernah juga terlintas di fikiran mahu request pindah, namun rasanya masi awal untuk saya give up. Baru sikit bah cabaran hidup di sini ney. Banyak benda lagi maw belajar. Masih banyak benda saya perlu alami untuk ajar diri jadi matang di sini. Lagipun macam terbiasa sudah ney hidup jauh dari family, hidup berdikari sendiri, hidup susah sendiri. Jadi, Yean kasih kuat semangat!!

Bah cukuplah kan. Nanti saya lawat lagi. InsyaAllah, mungkin tahun depan kali, hahahaha.



The strong girl,


Yean.



Publish !!!


19 September 2016

I am a backpacker newbie 2

Assalamualaikum wbt.

Hello.

Ini lah masalahnya kalau kerja shift. Bila balik dari kerja penat, then lupa update belog. Lagi lagi kalau overtime πŸ™„πŸ™„ Allah swt jak la yang tahu keperitan mencari rezeki demi seauap nasi. Namun kita tak boleh mengeluh ✌🏽️✌🏽️

Okay, sampai jak hatyai jam 6++ pagi kita orang semua cari makan for sarapan pagi. Then meneruskan mission mission kaki kaki shopping untuk shopping dia sana. Kalau orang macam saya ney of course la cuci mata saja mampu. Sebabnya satu, saya terikat dengan budget yang saya telah tetapkan. Dua, memang tiada satu barang pun yang masuk dalam jiwa raga saya. 

Kemidian, teruskan perjalanan lagi untuk check in hotel. Dalam satu bilik ada 4 orang. Lepas check in, kita kena bawa pula pegi floating market. Boleh membeli belah and cari makan di sana. Ya of course saya lebih suka cari makan πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

Lepas habis aktiviti di sana, kita balik hotel and acara bebas. Kita boleh pergi mana saja yang kita suka. Then saya dengan Yaya melunaskan niat untuk bermassage satu badan dengan harga Rm40 sahaja for almost 2 hours. Segar bugar badan jooo. Hahaha. Balik hotel jak terus pengsan atas katil. Sangat best πŸ˜‚

 Then the next day sempat pegi jalan2 and pegi pasar berhampiran. Tepat jam 1 petang kita orang bergerak pulang KL. Sampai KL Sentral, kami tak sempat naik last komuter pegi KLIA 2. So terpaksa tido di sana. Bangun jam 3.30 am then tggu komuter first utk pegi KLIA2 jam 4++ sebab flight jam 6++. Panik juga namun syukur sempat sampai di airport walaupun penat. Da macam RunningMan pula rasanya πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

Then terbang pegi Kota Bharu Kelantan..

Maybe, to be continue πŸ˜‚


The penat girl,






Yean.


Publish!!

28 August 2016

Never Run Back To The Person Who Broke You

Don’t let it be in a moment of weakness when you’re feeling alone and just want someone familiar to comfort you. Don’t let it be when you’re drowning your sorrows in a bottle and you send a text message that your future self will hate you for. Don’t let it be because you think you can’t do better and they’re still close enough for you to reach, but far enough that they might still be able to get away.

Don’t run back to them because you’re lonely, or sad, or heartbroken because the person who broke you won’t be able to fix the broken pieces and glue your heart back together. After all, they were the ones who broke it in the first place.

If you go back you think it’ll be different this time. You think that they’ve changed, that things have changed, that you have grown as individuals and as people, but things won’t change.

There is still a good chance you’ll get hurt, again, because after all it is possible to have your heart broken more than once by the same person.
You might think they’re different, you might want to believe them when they say they’ve changed, but in all honesty they haven’t changed. Maybe in the beginning they can cover up who they are a little bit more. Maybe they can fool you that this time around things will be different, but people don’t really change.

In the beginning you’ll probably feel like you made the right choice because this time you can see they’re trying. You feel like things are going to be different because they care more about you and your relationship, but things will turn from blissful to an instant reminder of why things didn’t work out the first time, or the second time.

If you go back to them they’ll just think that whatever they do you will forgive them for and keep doing it without any concern to how their actions make you feel. They can apologize all they want for their actions and the way they made you feel, but they don’t actually mean it. Not when they continue to do the same thing over and over.

You are not weak for loving them and you are not weak for thinking that they might have changed because you honestly want the best for the people you love.
You want to believe that things will be better for them because you never want to see the person you love fail. But you can’t go down with them. You can’t be with someone who repeatedly drags you down and breaks your heart because of their own selfish ways. That isn’t healthy.

You just feel magic in the air around them, you feel like the world is more alive and you forget all your pain when you’re around them on a good day, but when it isn’t a good day it’s impossible to forget and you’ll torture yourself with self-hate for going back.

You know they aren’t good for you, but you can’t help it. You’re drawn to them and you can’t help but want them, even though you know how they aren’t good for you.

But you owe yourself more than that.

You owe yourself more than going back to the person who has hurt you time after time because as much as you want them to change, they won’t and you can’t help a person who doesn’t want to help themself.
I know it’s hard and I know you miss them, but you can’t go back to someone who doesn’t bring out the best in you. Being with someone who drags you down isn’t healthy and they will continue to hurt you, even if they promised they wouldn’t.

Know your worth and stand up for yourself.

I know it might be hard now, but I promise it will be better in the future and the pain you’re feeling inside will heal, it might take months or years, but eventually it will be okay.

You will grow on your own and work towards the person you want to be. Your happiness will be yours again and the best part is you will be the one who is creating it.

By Becca Martin 😘


Sharing is caring. Just copy and paste


Yean.


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17 August 2016

I am a backpacker Newbie.

Assalamualaikum.

Hai semua. Lama tak bersua. Lama tak berceloteh di sini. Rindu juga. Banyak benda maw share sini selalu namun tak mampu and tak tahu macam mana maw susun ayat. Hahaha.

Well, today maw kongsi cerita la. Memandangkan terbangun awal sebab tido awal kot semalam. Well the story started with Yaya, who asked me if I wanna join to go to Hatyai with the rombongan group LLBM. Approximately, with 80 person. Wow! It is a big group isn't it? So after a long time, i decided to join. Lagi pun trip pegi kashmir saya cancel due to some important matter that maybe happen next year. So we already booked flight TWU-KLIA2, KLIA2-KBR, KBR-KKIA, KKIA-TWU. It was a really really really long journey. 

So, first day of journey started at 11st August. We headed to Tawau Airport approximately at 2pm. Kami singgah makan di restoran Pak Ali then gerak ke airport. Jam 03:30pm fly to KLIA2. Sampai seja sana, terus gerak ke Batu Kentomen naik KL transit. It cost RM25 per head (lebih kurang la), if you buy ticket KLIA2 to Putrajaya/cyberjaya and another ticket from Putrajaya to KL sentral. Daripada beli KL Express yang cost RM 55 per head dari KLIA2 to KL Sentral.

Then sampai KL sentral Beli lagi another KTM ticket cost dalam lebih kurang RM3 per head utk pegi Batu Kentomen. Then we sleep over Yaya Aunt's house for one night. 

Then petang 12hb August tue, dalam jam 6.30pm kita orang gerak ke KL sentral. Awal sikit sebab kitaorang maw tukar duit MYR to Baht (100 baht = RM 11) lebih kurang. Then jam 8pm kita orang berkumpul la dengan geng2 LLBM. Selepas penat pusing2 KL Sentral tue akhirnya jumpa juga dengan kak Nita Sujak tue. Dalam jam 10pm juga kami bergerak ke hatyai.

Finish part 1.






Tired girl,

Yean.


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19 July 2016

100th Days been together.

Assalamualaikum. 

Hello. Hello. Hello. 

Typing this while looking at him get ready for our dinner with his family. Yes. I was at his hometown here. Spending time together after been away for two weeks. Almost two weeks actually. Cuti raya saya dua belas hari.

This post actually celebrating our 100th days in relationship. Well, tipu la kalau xda ups and downs kan. Even try hard untuk tidak bergaduh pun tetap jua tue ego akan keluar πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚.

So, saya harap kamurang semua yang terbaca akan post ini (kalau ada laaa), i hope everyone will doakan yang terbaik untuk hubungan ini berakhir hingga ke jinjang pelamin dan ke Jannah. InsyaAllah. Bah yang mengenali diri ini, tunggu la kad kahwin yerr. Aamiin. 



The happy kiddo,




Yean.


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17 July 2016

Dear Best Friend.

Assalamualaikum wbt. 

Dear Best Friend

 Do you remember those days when we became close? I bet you do. The days when I was a fallen feather and you were a hurling hurricane of greatness. When I was one slit away from ending it all and you refused to let go of my hands. When all I knew was sadness, but then you came along, and made me know you which was something more than mere happiness. 

 Dear Best Friend

 Maybe I've told you this before, maybe I haven't- But I need you to know how much you mean to my mind and soul. You lifted me enough for me to touch the stars and know that this world is not all tragic. You seemed to me, like an unbreakable universe ready to conquer hearts for life, and pardon me you still are the same person I knew, but I guess sometimes you need to fall down to rise even higher.

 Dear Best Friend

 I know they let you go and honestly, I fail to understand why. They lost a gem that could show them paths that they have never walked before and form smiles that have not been as genuine before. I know they let you go and shattered your heart but I swear I wont do the same. And although what they did angers me, I'm not here to hate them, I'm here to love you. 

 Dear Best Friend

 Im sorry for the times I hurt you and the times I misunderstood. I know I made mistakes and I cant promise that I wont make more, but I can promise to never make the mistake of letting you go. I want you to tell me if I ever strike your heart and ill tell you if you ever did at mine. I need you to trust me and I promise to never doubt your love again.

 Dear Best Friend

 I want you to know that ill be there for you through every storm of sadness and every whirl of delight. I will not only love you for your greatness, I will love you for you with all your flaws and edges. I will listen when you speak and I will listen when you have run out of words to utter. I will stand by you as you stood by me with stronger bones which you gave rise to and I promise I would do what is in my power to not let a single knife near your heart. 

Dear Best Friend

I need you to know that I love you and I will never stop. Maybe forever doesn't last forever, but mine will for a lifetime, hence I owe you my word and my life. 

 Dear Best Friend

 I'm here to stay.


#copyandpaste


The one and only, 




Yean.




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13 July 2016

To The Person Who Stayed

Assalamualaikum wbt.



"Some may stay, some may go."
A wiseman once told me that.

But all through my life, I've met a lot of people who were temporary. 
We had become close and almost all of my friends told me like "we're inseparable". We have made a lot of amazing memories which I'll never forget for the rest of my life.

I understand that some people are not destined to stay with each other forever and it is normal for people to go their separate ways. Some people will stay and grow with us, but some people are meant to leave. 

But the wonderful thing 
that happened to me is that,
You never left. 

When I first saw you, I never thought I'd actually talk and have a great conversation with you and I had no idea  how much you'd do actually for me. I thought of you just another person who'll actually just gonna pass through, but I'm incredibly lucky that I had it wrong. 

You have been there for me, through my ups and downs, you've celebrated with me through the good times and mourn with me through the time of sorrows. You've seen me at my best and worst. I love that whenever we talk; I know that at the end of the line, you'll be cheering me up no matter what. You've been the cause of my mirthless since day one. 

The joy of having someone like you is indescribable, the thought makes me so happy, I'm so lucky that I was able to meet a person like you. 

And you know what's the best part of our friendship? Is that distance never really mattered and it never changed us. We're able to pick up right where we left off. It is so easy to lose connection with someone when there are miles standing between us, but that never happened to us. This just goes to shows that our friendship made us love each other even more and how much we've grown as a person. 

It's not easy for me to say how much you have changed me, because it is impossible to see where I would be right now without you. I can honestly and truly say that my life would never ever be the same without the person who loved me as I am, without you. 
I never thought I'll value a friendship this hard, until you came. 

I know that wherever life takes me or wherever life takes you, we will never cut off connections to each other. We've been through so much together, I'm confident that even the gods can't break us apart.

And I know at this point not even the gods can break us, I'm thankful that out of all the people who I have met, You're the person who stayed. 

I never knew how much you mean to me. I can't imagine my life without you. 

Thank you for being my person, but my person who stayed. 

–Bojie Galamay

#copyandpaste





The thankful girl,

Yean.



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10 June 2016

This Guy is Mine ❤️

Assalamualaikum wbt.

Hello everyone. Post kali ini maw buat official announcement la kunun. Memandangkan hari ney birthday dya (09/06/2016), and esok (10/06/2016) is our monthsarry yang ke dua. I want to introduce to you all la kunun the love of my life.


Hohoho. My En. Kesayangan name is tuutt. He is from Semporna. Thats it. Hahaha. For the first time I saw him, ada getar dalam jiwa. Tapi masa tue xla layan sangat sebab masih protes lagi kan kenapa la perlu pindah Hospital Tawau ney.  Jauh dari keluarga, jiwa suda sebati dengan ED Likas. But what to do. Masa tue memang terpaksa positive kan diri. Berdoa semoga ada hikmah.

Kerja dengan dya di department yang sama. Mula-mula xda orang pun tegur.  Mungkin sebab sya jenis kalau orang xtegur xjua la sya tegur tue orang πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ Lama2 bila selalu kerja dengan dya start la bercakap jua. And then pandai la dya buat lawak. Tue yang buat sya tertarik kali πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚. Mula2 takut maw bagi tahu. Last2 saya jua yang confess even takut kena reject. Yup, memang saya yang kejar dya. Hhahaha. 

Tapi syukur la, xjua kena reject mentah mentah, even dya take time maw buat keputusan. Sabar jak la sya. Alhamdullillah, Allah bersama orang yang sabar. And now 2 months already. Even saya kuat merajuk, banyak perangai buruk namun dya tetap sabar seja layan karenah saya yang minta puji ney. Hahaha. 

Okay lah, cukup dulu sampai sini. Doakan hubungan ini hingga ke level yang seterusnya (kahwin kot, memang dalam perancangan suda) dan hingga ke Jannah. Aamiin, InsyaAllah.


The happy Kiddo,


Yean.


Publish!!!

08 June 2016

The Relationship Problem.

Every relationship gets boring and it will get boring after you've been together for years. It's always fun in the beginning. It's always exciting when you're getting to know each other. It's always thrilling to chase one another. Eventually, it gets hard. Eventually, it becomes difficult. Eventually, it drains you. That's when people tend to quit and go look for someone else because "the spark is gone" and they want to feel wanted and admired and loved again. But listen, that's not how it's supposed to be. No, that's not how it works. It doesn't have to be that way. Even when it does get boring, that's when you're supposed to remember why you're with that person in the first place and it's never too late to find that happiness that you both once found together because the truth is, it's always been there and it never left. Even when it feels like feelings are fading, that's when you're supposed to know how much this person means to you and what losing them would be like because being able to love someone even when they're being hard to love shows that your feelings never left. Even when it feels like you're done, that's when you're supposed to realize that no matter who you're with, it's always going to get "boring" so you might as well be with someone who's willing to love you 
unconditionally and never give up on you.


Copy and paste. #sharingthegoodvibes


Yean. 

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07 June 2016

You Will Remember Her 😏

Assalamualaikum wbt.


One day, you’ll remember the girl who loved you so much that she forgot to love herself. You’ll remember her when you wake up, when you eat, when you’re about to sleep. She will be your greatest nightmare. You will be the one crying, and she will be the one happy with someone else.

One day, you’ll regret losing her. You lost the girl who did everything for you. You lost the girl who was always there for you when no one else is. You lost her because of your ego. You lost the girl who stayed by your side even if you threw harsh words to her. You lost the girl who tried to understand you when she needed you and you were not there.

One day, you’ll realize that she was the one for you. The girl who stood by your side even if you don’t appreciate her. The girl you chose to let go because you’re full of pride. One day, you’ll realize that the girl you screwed up and left for another girl, was the girl who kept on fighting and defending you when she hears gossips about you.
One day, you’ll see her happy and contented with the life she have when you left her. She will thank you for letting her go and for making her realize she is worth of something so much better, that there is someone out there who is willing to do everything for her. She will look into your eyes with no feelings for you at all.

One day, when you see her, you will feel like you’ve been stabbed in your heart a millions times for giving up on her. And when that day comes, no matter what you do, no matter what you say to her, it will not make sense because she was already done spending years of her life trying to make you love her as she loved you. But you didn’t.


The happy girl,


Yean.


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Ramadan Al-Mubarak

Assalamualaikum wbt. 


Ramadan kini menjelang lagi. Alhamdullillah, hari ini ramadan ke 2. 

Untuk tahun ini, saya menjalani ramadan di tempat orang. Jauh dari keluarga. Tahun ke dua saya berpuasa tanpa keluarga di sisi. Namun, alhamdullillah kali ini saya tidak sendirian. Terima kasih kepada En. Teddy Bear sebab sentiasa ada untuk elakkan saya rasa kesunyian. Even sebelum bulan ramadan tiba. Terima kasih sayang.

Iftar pertama bersama keluarga dya di Semporna. Syukur masih ada tempat saya menumpang kasih. Masih ada tempat saya berteduh walaupun jauh dari family. Semoga hubungan ini erat hingga ke akhir hayat. Aamiin.


Selamat menjalani ibadah puasa.


Yean.


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09 May 2016

ARE YOU WITH THE RIGHT PARTNER?

Guys! Take time to read this! WORTH READING :)


During a seminar, a woman asked," How do I know if I am with the right person?"

The author then noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so he said, "It depends. Is that your partner?" In all seriousness, she answered "How do you know?" Let me answer this question because the chances are good that it's weighing on your mind
replied the author.

Here's the answer.

Every relationship has a cycle… In the beginning; you
fall in love with your partner. You anticipate their calls,
want their touch, and like their idiosyncrasies. Falling in love wasn't hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn't have to DO anything. That's why it's called "falling" in love.

People in love sometimes say, "I was swept of my feet."Picture the expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something happened TO YOU.

Falling in love is a passive and spontaneous experience. But after a few months or years of being together, the euphoria of love fades. It's a natural cycle of EVERY relationship.

Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts. The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship; you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.

At this point, you and/or your partner might start asking, "Am I with the right person?" And as you reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you
may begin to desire that experience with someone
else. This is when relationships breakdown.

The key to succeeding in a relationship is not finding the right person; it's learning to love the person you found.

People blame their partners for their unhappiness and look outside for fulfillment. Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes.

Infidelity is the most common. But sometimes people turn to work, a hobby, friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances. But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your relationship. It lies within it.

I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in love with someone else. You could. And TEMPORARILY you'd feel better. But you'd be in the same situation a few years later.

Because (listen carefully to this):

The key to succeeding in a Relationship is not finding the right person; it's learning to love the Person you found.

SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. You have to work on it day in and day out. It takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it demands WISDOM. You have to know
WHAT TO DO to make it work. Make no mistake about it.

Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do (with or without your partner), Just as there are physical laws Of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. If you know how to apply these laws, the results are predictable.

Love is therefore a "decision". Not just a feeling.

Remember this always: God determines who walks into your life. It is up to you to decide who you let walk away, who you let stay, and who you refuse to let GO! ♥


#copyandpaste


The reader,

Yean.

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03 May 2016

Friends Forever ??

Assalamualaikum wbt. 




The bond that my forever friend and I have is something that I do not have with any other person in the world. This is how you know that you have a forever friend:

You never get tired of being around her
She is probably the only person in your life that hasn't begun to bother you for some reason or another, at some point in time. You could spend hours, or days, with her. Even the smallest things you do together are fun, because you are with her.

No subject is off limits. You tell each other everything, and I mean, everything. Thinking about seeing each other over college break. Your family is her family, and her family is yours. Its not weird for you to be at her house all the time, show up at strange hours, or just decide to spend the night even though you live three houses away. And of course, her family welcomes you in like you are another one of their daughters.

You two have a bizarre sense of humor that only you understand. Whether it is the nights you spend watching random YouTube videos at 2am that make you both laugh so hard you cry, or the commercials on TV that are only funny to the both of you, only you guys understand the humor in certain situations. You have probably experienced some of the most embarrassing moments together, and if not together, then you got a vivid story of event.

You have no filter when she is being over-dramatic. You pick up where you left off.
If you and your forever friend are anything like me and mine, we do not talk every single day. You may only speak once a week, but it will give you the opportunity to catch up and talk like you have talked every single day. There may be quick conversations to see how the other is doing, because you know you are saving all of the important stories for when you see each other again. At this point, conversations don't even start with "hi" anymore, you just jump right to the point and tell her what you need to.

You really don’t have a choice when she needs to go to the mall.

She would do anything to make you smile. Even when you are feeling down, your forever friend knows just the right thing to do to make you happy again. Whatever the case is, she will be there for you always. She will say, and do, just about anything that will make everything better.

And sometimes she just needs a reminder…


That she's your best friend.

By: Taylor Webb


I miss my best friend!!




Yean.



Publish!

27 April 2016

Love.

Assalamualaikum wbt.


Love is much simpler when you’re young.

As we get older, love gets complicated. It becomes more complex, more intricate and MUCH more delicate.

Falling in love is harder. Letting go of past loves is even harder than that.

Why is this? Why doesn’t love get EASIER every year? This would make more sense. And the truth seems unnatural — backwards, even.

More wisdom and experience should make it easier for us to find love. And, believe it or not, falling in love is partly a decision. Love isn't magical on its own; we make it magical.

With age, that magic fades. Life’s magic fades, too.

Of course, how much the magic fades depends on the person. And because “true” magic (Γ  la Harry Potter) doesn’t exist, the kind of magic we’re familiar with happens when you accept the answer to life is not knowing the answer.

And that is partially why love loses its magical qualities over time. The more intelligent we become, the less there is to wonder. The more you understand love and your role in it, the harder it is for you to find romance.

At the same time, some of the most intelligent people in the world fall in love with the highest frequency.

So there must be more to the equation. And there is.

In order to fall in love, you need to feel that you need love. Because if you don’t believe you need or deserve love, you’ll reject it — whether consciously or subconsciously.

And what does it mean when someone wants or needs love? It means that person wants a partner to share life’s adventures. This person is, to put it bluntly, lonely.

So, the more independent and intelligent you are, the harder it is for you to find love.

Independence — more than intelligence — ruins our relationships.

Think about it. Why do people break up even when things are (seemingly) going well?

It's because they want independence. They don't want to spend every single day with their significant others.

And even if they love each other, they need time for themselves. They need to spend time alone.

When two people enter a relationship, they give up some of their independence in order to have a loving and caring partnership. And it's a beautiful thing — it really is. But the more independent you are, the more likely you are to feel suffocated.

People often feel suffocated when their partner has different ideas about the level of independence “allowed” in the relationship.

When one person is significantly more independent than the other, the relationship is going to become messy. The least independent person is going to try and cling on to the more independent as hard as he or she can, while the independent person will do his or her best to get some breathing room.

One feels hurt, and the other feels smothered.

The trick is finding someone who is just as independent. Though I'm afraid this doesn't guarantee anything — your need for independence will vary over time, there’s no way to predict what you’ll need in the future.

But having similar requirements in terms of independence does make it more likely that you’ll be compatible.

“Independence compatibility” still isn’t enough. Your intelligence will make things difficult.

Romantic love — at least how we perceive it now — is doomed.

If you think about it, it’s funny. We've learned how to do math. We've learned about science and literature. I can even remember learning how to balance a check back in eighth grade.

But we were never taught how to love. There are no classes. No textbook chapter is dedicated to it. We go into love blind.

And we're silly enough to believe that, because love is a natural phenomenon, we don’t need to learn how to do it properly.

Do you know what else is natural? Running. But we have professional athletes and trainers. Talking is natural, but we have professional speakers. Thinking is also natural, and we have scholars and philosophers.

Love may be instinctive but there are certainly better and worse ways to love. There is certainly plenty to learn.

But for some reason, we don’t write a lesson plan for love. Loving is arguably the most important thing people do in life, but we don't teach our kids how to do it properly.

So what happens when the most intelligent people on this planet experience love? They question it. They want to better understand it, explore it and test it.

Get stuck on a math problem, and it’ll drive you nuts. Get stuck trying to figure out love, and it almost certainly will drive you mad.

Love has started wars. It has taken lives. It has tortured, maimed and destroyed. And the more intelligent you are, the more perplexed you will be by the way our world understands and portrays love.

Because love centers on emotion, it’s not easy for an intelligent person to find and keep it. The emotions will send this person on an anxious tailspin.

If you're looking for a theory on love, you simply need to find one — or you need to accept the truth that you aren't willing to face.

Love isn't magical on its own. We make it magical. It's all in our heads.

By: Paul Hudson, Elite Daily


Sharing is caring.


The lovely girl πŸ™„πŸ™„



Yean.


Publish!

26 April 2016

Kau kena kuat.

Assalamualaikum wbt.

Hari ney maw berkongsi pasal . . .




Kau kena kuat. 

Kau tahu. Hidup ini bukan mudah. Saat kau dilahirkan dulu, ibumu bertarung nyawa. Peritnya hanya Tuhan yang tahu. 

Kau lihat ibu senyum. Ayah tenang. Cerita keperitan telah mereka pendam. Agar kau senang jalani kehidupan. Mereka dulu telah rasa pahit maungnya. Lebih mengerti sakit dalam hati. 

Bila kau dewasa. Kau cari erti bahagia. Sedang Allah telah beri rasa itu dalam rasa hidup berkeluarga. Meski secebis. Meski famili berantakan misalnya namun kau masih dijaga dan dilindungi. Bukankah itu bahagia yang tak kau nampak. 

Kau nak lebih bahagia. Kau tamak. Kau cari bahagia melalui manusia lain. Kau campak rasa percaya rasa cinta. Tapi seringkali rasa itu dikecewa lantaran bahagia itu tak semudah teori bayangan.

 "Kenapa aku tak dapat bahagia yang aku inginkan?" Bahagia itu bila kau belajar bersyukur. 

Kau ada siapa sekarang, kau syukur. Kau hargai. Kau ada ibu, kau syukur. Kau ada ayah, kau syukur. Kau tiada keduanya kau ada adik beradik, kau syukur. Kau tiada sesiapa tapi kau ada orang yang sudi dengar aduan kau, kau syukur. 

Hatta kau tiada sesiapa, kau syukurlah. Syukur kerana masih ada rasa. Tuhan masih beri kau rasa. Kau tak gembira sekalipun, lidah masih kecap rasa. Perut masih terasa lapar. 

Kau jua masih ada hati. Meski hati itu kosong. 

Tugas kau, isi rasa kosong itu dengan rasa yang padu. Selama ini kau sedaya penuhkan dengan kasih insan. Cuba kau isikan dengan kasih Tuhan. Cuba. 

Bila kasih Allah sudah bersarang, kau tidak perlukan sandaran lain lagi hatta dunia ini tidak bererti lagi. Kau terasa ingin segera berehat di kuburan. Kau terasa segera nak ke akhirat. Perindu yang merindukan Kekasihnya Rabbul Jalaali wal Ikram. 

Selagi dunia masih di hati. Kasih Ilahi pasti tidak kau rasai. 

Kuatlah. Kau kena ingat, dugaan membadai untuk hapuskan nafsumu yang membara pada duniawi. Nasrun minallah. Pertolongan dari Allah lah itu. 
Hati sedih sebab nafsu hasut "cintalah dunia, cintalah dunia!" Buat hati terpagut lesu bagai dirantai kaki pada tiang dunia selamanya.
 
Kuatlah. Kau kena kuat lagi. Makin kau cuba lupakan dunia, makin kuat kelazatan dunia mengerumunimu. 
Kuatlah. Kau kena kuat lagi. 
Terus kuat. 

#tunangkutidaktampan #copyandpaste


Strong girl,



Yean.


Publish!

25 April 2016

Proud to be.

Assalamualaikum wbt.



I know you're tired.

I know you are physically, mentally, and emotionally drained.

I know you dont have much quality time with your family.

I know at some point you were thinking, how bad you are as a son, because you couldn't take care of your own father and mother, as you're too busy treating patients with mild cough at 4.00 am in the late night 300km+ away from your hometown.

But you have to keep going.

And I will also do the same.

Cause we are proud, to be called, 'The Dressar'.

#TheDressar #copypaste


The dressar,


Yean.


Publish!!!


22 April 2016

Aib.

Assalamualaikum wbt.

Di hari Jumaat yang mulia ini, penghulu di segala hari, jom sama sama kita memperbaiki diri. Hari ney topik pasal AIB. 

Apa itu aib? 

Aib ialah dosa dan keburukan yang ada dalam diri kita, ada dalam setiap manusia. Semua orang punya aib tapi tak semua aib kita dikongsi dengan orang ramai kan? Sebab hanya Allah yang mengetahui aib kita dan menyembunyikannya. Baiknya Allah kerana berapa banyak aib yang kita ada tapi Allah tetap Maha Penyayang, tetap buka pintu taubat. 

Baik, ini kisahnya. Pada zaman nabi musa berlaku kemarau yang panjang. Nabi musa bersama 70 ribu umatnya melakukan solat istisqa' iaitu solat memohon agar Allah menurunkan hujan. Tapi hujan tetap tidak turun. Seperti yang kita ketahui nabi musa digelar dengan Kalimullah kerana boleh berbicara langsung dengan Allah.

Nabi musa berkata pada Allah. "Ya Rabb, Kau selalu memperkenankan doaku."

Lalu Allah menjawab, "Antara kalian itu terdapat seseorang yang bermaksiat selama 40 tahun dan tidak pernah bertaubat."

Sejurus itu bertanya nabi musa kepada umatnya. "Siapa antara kalian yang bermaksiat selama 40 tahun dan tak pernah bertaubat. Diminta meninggalkan tempat ini kerana hujan tidak turun kerana orang ini."

Orang tersebut berasa bersalah kerana menjadi sebab hujan tidak turun. Maka berbicara dihatinya jika dia bangun meninggalkan tempat itu maka terbukalah di depan khalayak akan aib dirinya yang tersorok selama 40 tahun. Lalu dia pun memohon agar Allah ampunkan dosanya dan menyesal di atas dosa dosanya itu.

Tak lama selepas itu hujan pun turun. Nabi musa kehairanan. Tak ada yang mengaku berbuat dosa 40 tahun dan tiada yang meninggalkan tempat ini tapi Allah turunkan hujan.

Lalu nabi musa bertanya kepada Allah, "Mengapa Kau turunkan hujan wahai Allah?"

Lalu Allah jawab kerana orang tersebut telah bertaubat.

Nabi musa bertanya lagi, bolehkah aku ingin tahu siapakah orangnya?

Allah jawab, "Selama 40 tahun Aku tidak pernah membuka AIBnya, adakah Aku akan membuka aibnya setelah dia bertaubat kepada Aku?"

Masha Allah. Masha Allah.. Allah sangat menjaga aib kita. Jadi marilah kita menjaga aib sendiri dan tidak membuka aib orang lain di sekitar kita. Kalau kita jaga aib orang inshaAllah Allah akan jaga aib kita.

Wallahualam.


#copyandpaste


The sinner,


Yean.


Publish!!

21 April 2016

The Unsung Heroes!

Assalamualaikum wbt. 


When you try your best, but considered not succeed.
When you get what you want, but not what you need.

While you are reading this, there is someone, somewhere out there trying his best saving people's life on daily basis.

To that someone out there, just wanna thank you, for keep doing this job up until this point. 

This was not a rant to cry for some respect, this is just a rant saying that no matter who do you think we are, whether a slave or a hero, we'll just keep our beats, cause God knows who we are and what we are doing.

We might not know you, but if you know us and keep on supporting us, we'll love you forever, brother and sister.



Proud to be Assistant Medical Officer,



Yean.


Publish!!

16 April 2016

Announcement!!!

Assalamualaikum wbt.

Jeng jeng jeng. Hahahaha. Lately banyak yang tegur napa happy semacam? Nampak bahagia? 

Alhamdullillah, now I have someone to call as mine. Syukur dya terima kekurangan diri ini dan sebaliknya juga. Hubungan ini semestinya ada aim dya. 

We have plan to get married, InsyaAllah soon. Just pray for the happiness for both of us and also our family. 

Saya sudah pun bertemu with his family. Alhamdullillah, diterima dengan baik. And they ask me to not change my mind and heart. They pray for us. Itu yang penting. 

InsyaAllah after raya, dya pula yang akan berkunjung ke Ranau. Semoga perancangan ini berjalan dengan lancar berserta dengan izin Allah. Aamiin.


The happy girl.


Yean.


Publish!!

13 April 2016

Resam Padi.

Assalamualaikum wbt.


Pernah dgr ka peribahasa resam padi? 

"Semakin berisi tunduk ke bumi"  

Semakin berilmu merendah diri, itu sifat yg terpuji. Tidak kira la apapun kerjaya kamu ceburi. Jangan makin naik makin sombong dan angkuh 😌 Apapun, semoga kita sentiasa peroleh kemenangan dunia akhirat. 


InsyaAllah.


The sinner,


Yean.


Publish!!

08 April 2016

Homesick again!

Assalamualaikum.

Lately rasa rindu rumah tue membuak-buak. I don't know why. Hormon mengada-gada kali kan. Selama 6 tahun jadi perantau, baru sekarang rasa homesick yang teramat. 

Masa study di KK dulu tidak pula rajin maw pulang rumah. Siap mama call lagi, tanya balik rumah kah cuti weekend. And saya jarang pulang. Yes, maybe masa tue membawa hati yang luka kali aa πŸ˜‚Kecewa kan. Malas maw ber'deal' with other family, malas maw jumpa orang, takut terkenang kisah lama. Hahaha stupido!! And mungkin jua baru terasa sangat sunyi, di rumah ney pun jarang bercakap lepas dorang Yati pindah. Kadang-kadang rasa macam robot yang hari-hari buat benda yang sama. Bangun, pergi kerja, balik, mandi, makan, and tidur. And selalunya xmakan sebab terlampau penat. Untungla kalau termakan di tempat kerja, sebab bila balik rumah xda kawan makan. And I really hate to eat alone πŸ˜”

And now bila jauh rumah dengan tempat kerja almost 447km yang mengambil masa lebih kurang la 8 jam perjalanan darat, baru terasa homesick. Baru terfikir, kalau la Ranau tue dekat seja, minggu-minggu balik. Baru menghargai masa-masa terluang dirumah. Padan muka! 

Ya, mungkin ini lah perasaan mereka-mereka yang posting di semenanjung sekarang yang berbatu-batu jauhnya. At least, saya masih di Sabah. And i should be thankful. Alhamdullillah. Rasa sedih untuk dorang la juga. Hanya mampu cakap be strong, padahal sendiri pun menanggis jua. 

As a conclusion, tabah lah wahai hati. Hujung bulan May, insyaAllah kalu panjang umur, I will be back. Aamiin. Kbai.


The migraine girl.


Yean.




Publish!

06 April 2016

Pray for the best!!

Assalamualaikum wbt.

Hmmmm. Ternyata hati saya masih boleh  rasa tue sayang. Saya ingat hati saya mati sejak 6 tahun yang lalu. Syukur.

Tq En. A yang buat saya rasa tue butterfly in stomach again. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚. Memang dya sudah taw yang i have that feeling on him. But saya tidak tahu dya macam mana. The problems is our work. Pangkat? What ?? Perlukah saya hadapi ney drama?

No. What I mean is, pentingkah semua tue or it just satu alasan? Even if he was a bus driver, i do not care laaa. Rezeki tue semua dari Allah swt. Why should we must care about what people will say than to care about our feeling. Saya pun xfaham πŸ˜”πŸ˜”

Tapi bila fikir balik, mungkin tyta betul. I ask her opinion about this situation and she said :


"What if i say...... Tunggu sampai dia yang beria... Abis orang cakap, biar laki yang bersungguh dengan kita... Jangan perempuan.. Kalau pun kita yang bersungguh, biar laki tu jenis yang terima kita apa adanya... Bukan setakat suka, adore, minat, ada prasaan sayang sikit.... Sebab saya tengok dia macam belum ready jak... Supposed to be, dia yang kasih yakin ko kmu boleh teruskan.. X kisah la smpai mana, yg pnting cuba... Ni sampai mau pindah jabatan lagi.. No offense ah yean... Sebab saya pernah jump orang macam ni.. Memang la kita yang mati mati mau... Cuba jak, tapi last2 patah hati.. And i know, lain orang lain kisahnya, and maybe dia lain, sebab ko yang ada di sana kenal dia... Just my 2 cent opinion... Nasihat sy, jangan terlalu berharap... Walaupun susah buat tu perkara sebab i know u punya jenis, sekali sayang, memang akan buat betul2.. Just, hati2 saja and jaga hubungan baik2..."


Thanks to Allah swt for sending her to my life. Ya memang dulu sebelum dya kahwin, saya banyak bagi nasihat. And its time for me untuk minta pendapat dari dya. 

Well dari awal lagi saya xpernah give a high expectation, cause I have learned from my mistakes before. I will just follow the flow. Sakit bahh tue kecewa. Kalau dya xyakin macam mana saya maw yakin. Kan? Just pray for the best for both of us. Kalau ada jodoh adalah. Kalau tiada, InsyaAllah mission untuk travel dunia sendiri akan diteruskan hahaha.


This silly girl.


Yean.


Publish!!

05 April 2016

At the age of 25.

Assalamualaikum wbt.

Hakikatnya belum 25 tahun tapi bahang umur tue terasa suda sekarang ney. Panas telinga. Di bawah ney another karya yang di copy and di pastekan ke belog saya yang tak seberapa ney. Saja untuk perkongsian, tatapan di hari tua kelak.

Bila dah 25.
Masih lagi belajar,
Orang sibuk bertanya,
Bila nak kerja?
Bila nak kahwin?

Bila dah 25,
Dah ada kerjaya,
Yang tak semegah mana
Cukup sekadar apa yang ada,
Orang sibuk bertanya,
Bila nak kahwin?

Bila dah 25,
Dah kahwin.
Dah ada kerjaya,
Dah habis belajar,
Oh orang masih lagi bertanya
Perihal anak pula.

Alahai ibu ayah,
Mak cik pak cik,
Atuk nenek.
Wahai sekalian makhluk,
Meh saya nak bercerita,

Siapa yang tak nak habis belajar diusia muda?
Siapa yang tak nak dapat kerjaya yang hebat?
Siapa yang tak nak kahwin?
Siapa yang tak nak anak?
Kami nak.

Ada orang rezekinya pandai dalam akademiknya,
Tapi, lambat kerjayanya dan pernikahannya
Ada orang rezekinya hebat dalam kerjayanya,
Tapi, kurang dalam akademiknya dan pernikahannya,
Ada orang rezekinya memiliki segalanya di usia muda,
Tapi, dia diuji dengan cara berbeza.

Bukankah Dia dah tetapkan rezeki kami?
Dengan cara yang berbeza?

Bukan niat kami ingin melatah,
Apatah lagi membelakangkan kalian,
Jauh lagi ingin mempersoalkan tindakan kalian,
Kami tahu soalan itu sekadar bertanya,
Mengambil kisah dan prihatin tentang hidup kami.

Cuma kami ingin pengertian kalian,
Andai kalian membaca,
Andai kalian mengerti,
Doakanlah yang terbaik buat kamni,
Semoga doa kalian membuka pintu-pintu rezeki kami,
Dari arah yang berbeza.😘



Si gadis semasa.

Yean.



Publish!!

02 April 2016

Pendosa!

Assalamualaikum.



Patutnya dah tak layak hidup lagi.

Tapi Dia masih izin.

Kesempatan yang ada, jangan kau sia.

Andai esok masih ada, lusa belum tentu sama.





The Sinner, 

Yean.



Publish

29 March 2016

#roadbacktoAllah

Assalamualaikum.

Allahu akbar.
Betapa baiknya Ψ§Ω„Ω„Ω‡ itu dalam sudinya memberi pandangan baik2 semata untuk orang melihat kita.
Melangkaui wajah luaran,
Menembusi setiap inci pakaian.
Pelbagai perasaan berbaur2 setiap kali didatangi puji. Sayu memikirkan bagaimana maha baiknya Ψ§Ω„Ω„Ω‡ pada kita pendosa.
Dan bersekali dengan setiapnya, dibagi lagi masa untuk kita menjadi apa yang Ψ§Ω„Ω„Ω‡ percaya kita mampu jadi yang lebih baik, 
sebagaimana yang diizinkan Ψ§Ω„Ω„Ω‡ untuk dinampakkan.
Aku selalu tulis tentang ini. Tentabg betapa Ψ§Ω„Ω„Ω‡ itu lebih percayakan kemampuan kita berbanding kita sendiri. Maka percaya sahaja. Tidakkah Ψ§Ω„Ω„Ω‡ itu yang paling tahu segalanya? yang paling bijaksana?
Don't give up on you.
Macammana perit, sakit dan sulit. Macammana hina dan dina-- bangkit. Jangan mati dulu.
Setiap hari Ψ§Ω„Ω„Ω‡ masih bagi kita nyawa. untuk cuba semula. untuk bangun dan jadi somebody better.
Maka kalau Ψ§Ω„Ω„Ω‡ SENDIRI percaya segenap inci potensi kita, kenapa tidak kita?
Besar mana dosa kita, kalau kita sungguh2 nasuha dan berjanji tidak mengulangnya, terhapuslah bi iznillah.
Dan kalau Ψ§Ω„Ω„Ω‡ sudi maafkan kita, kita juga patut maafkan diri sendiri juga.
Make peace with yourself. terima kelemahan diri. dan ubah.
The first step to fix a problem,
is to admit we have a problem to fix.


#copyandpaste from Fynn Jamal's facebook acc.


The Sinner,



Yean.

Publish!

21 March 2016

Terima kasih

Assalamualaikum wbt. 

Terima kasih. 

Untuk yang pernah tikam dari belakang.
Hentak kuat sampai otak berdarah xtaw maw fikir apa.
Buang aku dalam lubang paling dalam.
Untuk yang pernah xpernah kisah.
Untuk segala tipu sunat & helah hebat.
Untuk yang datang sekadar menyibuk dan menghebah.
Untuk yang pura2 ambil tahu sekadar isi masa lapang.
Untuk janji2 dunia yang berterabur.

Tapi... Tidak lupa pada,

Yang Tarik tangan aku walau buruk mana pun aku.
Selalu ada walaupun xbuat apa,hanya mendengar.
Bagi semangat walau dia sendri xbrapa bersemangat.
Tidak pernah malu dengan gilanya aku.
Orang yang selalu tinggal bila semua lari ikut arus hidup.

Terima kasih. 
Terima kasih.

Hidup ni bosan tanpa kamu. 



Yean.


Publish!!

18 March 2016

Things that make me really HAPPY !

Assalamualaikum wbt.

Hello everyone. Di sebabkan kebosanan melanda diri ini yang sedang 'bersauna' di dalam bilik ney. Tercetus la idea maw meng'update' belog ney. Hohoho. 

Okay the topic is things that make me really happy. Lama juga la berfikir, apa benda-benda yang buat saya bergumbira, senang hati, bahagia dan yang sama waktu dengannya. 

Pertama. Beach or sea. Not only make happy but also feel calm. Sangat menenangkan. Apa lagi kalau buat aktiviti atau sukan air. Wow. Banyak juga kenangan manis di pantai and laut ney. Kadang-kadang ia buat kita rindu dengan orang tu. Hmmmm. I really want to take a diving license. InsyaAllah. Pernah juga orang tanya. Lebih suka naik kapal terbang atau kapal laut? Dengan senang hati saya jawab, kapal laut. At least you still feel the fresh air kann. You feel the freedom. Cuba naik kapal terbang, sudahlah tinggi, menakutkan lagi. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

Kedua. When I am with my family. It was really hard to see my family together. Bila dah besar and berkerja or study out of hometown memang sangat sangat susah maw jumpa. Sometimes it takes 3 months for me to meet my dad. Just imagine how i miss being with him. Memang sangat susah untuk kami berenam berkumpul dirumah. Kalaulah tawau dengan ranau ney dekat seja sanggup jua sya balik even dua hari jak cuti πŸ˜”πŸ˜”

Ketiga. Earning my own money. As the eldest kid in family, saya perlu pikul banyak tanggungjawab. Bila dari kecil suda dibiasakan untuk dapatkan sesuatu tue perlu berusaha sendiri, nah hingga dewasa sudah terbiasa. Gaji pertama dalam hidup sya was RM15/day. Gaji pergi tanam padi. Bayangkan kalu seminggu straight berapalah sudah duit dapat. But hitam laaa kulit. Saya pernah kerja at Kedai DG, lepas SPM. Masa tue teringin maw belajar main gitar, then i buy it with my first gaji disana. Masa tue gaji RM450. Memang puas hati. 😌😌

Keempat. Travelling. Yes. Menjelajah ke dunia baru. Tempat yang orang lansung xkenal kau. Ffuuhh. Awesome kann feeling dya. Belajar tradisi, adat, gaya hidup dorang, menikmati nature di sana. Wow. I love travel. Tempat pertama dalam Sabah (di luar daerah Ranau) yang saya pergi was Kota Kinabalu. At the age of 8years old. Ikut trip family besar sebelah mama jalan-jalan. Kalau luar Sabah pula, umur 15 tahun pegi Kuching, Sarawak. Sebab kazen kahwin. Kalau luar negara, of course, Phuket and Krabi, Thailand. Last year. Tahun ney suda pergi Nunukan, Indonesia. A rare place but still got tourist going there. Next year planning pegi Kashmir πŸ‘πŸ½πŸ‘πŸ½

Kelima. Bila kerja dapat bantu orang. To be honest, it is really hard for me to adapt this kind if career. Lebih-lebih lagi bila kau dari kecil xsuka tempat ney. I mean Hospital. Dari dulu suda set dalam otak yang hospital ney aura dya hitam, terlampau banyak kesedihan dari gembira. That is why I hate this place. But then now I worked at hospital. Karma maybe. But I've realised, the feeling was hard to describe. Bila kau tolong orang yang kesusahan, and dya say thank you. Akan timbul perasaan bangga di hati kau. But not riak. It makes you want to help other more. πŸ˜„πŸ˜„

I think enough for now. See you for the next topic soon.


Yean.




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01 February 2016

Hate myself

Assalamualaikum.

Again. I am back to my depression stat. Insomnia. Crying every night.

I just hate myself now. I really hate. Iwish to forget everything. Please. Saya tidak mampu suda angkat semua ney. Penat bah. 

Sesak dada. Stress. Sampai bila maw begini? Sakit. 


Broken hearted girl,



Yean.


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17 January 2016

Someone like you.

Assalamualaikum wbt. 

After a while. Tetiba rasa maw post something here. Tadi ada nyanyi lagu Someone Like You by Adele di Big Mugz. Well tipu la kalu xterfikir pasal kisah lama kan. Hahaha.

But i will never find someone like him. Never. Ever. Takkan lah maw rasa tue sakit berkali-kali kan. Jangan jadi bodoh katanya hahaha.

Sebab asshole tue laa i closed my heart. Reject semua orang. Hmmmm.

Tak mengapalah. Semoga berbahagia seja la dya aa.


Typical girl,

Yean.


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01 January 2016

I love you.

Assalamualaikum wbt.

How much more time has to pass for me to forget you? How much more do I have to cry for the tears to stop? When you call my name like it is nothing. My heart hurts so much that I can not speak.

Tears keep falling, even when I try to hold it in. I keep thinking of you, even when I try to forget you. Words I hid, words I could not say, because I had no courage, because I could not bear to say it.

Words that linger around my lips, I love you.

I close my eyes and draw out the back of you. Without knowing, like a fool tears fall. I try to smile as nothing is wrong but my heart hurts so much that I can not speak. 

Because it hurts so much that my breath stop, because only scars remain, I do not think I can go on. I guess this is the end.

You not being here even when I shout out. Not being able to see you again. I can not believe in it, I can not believe it. Words I hid, words I could not say, words that linger around my lips, I love you.



That girl,

Yean.


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Tabung :)