09 December 2015

The Blackout Moment

Assalamualaikum wbt. 

Yeah. It is 23:33, and it was dark. Blackout.  I think my world is really black. Sesuai dengan emosi saya sekarang. There is so many thought in my mind right now. And I just can not find out the solution. 

The sky is so beautiful. The stars blinking, charmingly. I can see the shooting stars. Perfect. Can I make a wish? I wish to be happy. I want my family and friends to be happy. Nothing more or less.

Sitting near the window. Listening to music. It is so beautiful night. The silent of midnight. The sound of kereta yang lalu lalang di jalan raya. It make me think about my life now.

I admit it, I was going to far with my limit. I do what I want. It feels like a good girl gone bad. I hope someone slap me on the face. I think, it was too much! But I can not handle myself. Oooohh tidak! She is lost inside.

Why do I be like this? Why? I know myself. But why I become like this. Doing the thing i supposed to hate. Can i turn back time? Macam mana mahu betulkan semua kebodohan ney??

Help me please. . . .

The stupid girl,



08 December 2015

Another sad story.


It is been a while. I held onto my thoughts about you like this. Thinking about your voice. I feel more sad today.

I had a drink. I did it again all of sudden, wanting to see you. I hate seeing myself miserable. Until tomorrow, I am doing nothing. 

I thought we were going in the same direction. I thought we were dreaming of the same future. I guess that it was not.

I thought we were inthe same time. I thought we were in the same room. I guess that was not it.

Familiarness is sometimes troublesomes. I am afraid to forget it. Are you okay with it?

Do you not have any regrets about your decision? Are confident about your decision? I do not know anymore. 

Do you not miss my voice? Are there not times that you want to see me? It is only me, who is like that?

I am living, burried under your traces. It is me, who living burried under your traces. What am I supposed to do? 

Lonely girl,

Yean 💋


Tabung :)